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I grew up in a small town outside of Philadelphia. So small that my public high school graduating class was considered large with 63 students. We had such freedom back then. I cannot remember a single time when I couldn’t leave the house on my own and go wherever I wanted. None of us felt excited about our independence - it was expected. Fast forward to raising my own 3 sons in a CT community near Yale University where in every other home was a doctor or professor. Definitely more protective parenting, but still lots of freedom for a young person growing up. It was the norm for every kid to get a car when they earned a license. They drove to school, sports, parties - pretty much anywhere as long as they let their parents know (most times, anyway). They still experienced freedoms, even though all of the parents thought we were being relatively strict. When I retired to Savannah, I found that I missed the routine of a work day. I needed something more than attending 2 yoga classes each day. The lack of routine was difficult. One day, a woman on the next mat told me that she had just been appointed as a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA). It was EXACTLY what I was looking for! I had spent most of my career working with children. I had volunteered at different times in my life for charitable events. I felt like being a CASA would be an easy transition - how different could it be??? They are just kids afterall. So what did I learn that was different? A child in foster care experiences ZERO control over their own life. They are removed from their home by strangers. If lucky enough to find a placement quickly, they move into a house or group home with more strangers. They are now sent to a different school full of strangers. They are introduced to their Case Manager. Stranger. Lawyer. Stranger. The state and the foster parent take their role seriously but this means no real freedoms for the children. They are required to be accountable for the child at ALL times. There is no riding off on your bike to friends like I did when I was a kid. No one is rewarding them with a car for getting their license. The majority don’t have any ID, nevermind having an opportunity to get a license. Most don’t stay in the same foster home. By the time they are eligible to ‘age’ out of care at 18, they have been in 10 to 20 different foster homes. Each time starting over with that same cycle of strangers. Then they may be released from foster care. Can we then expect them to know how to be successfully independent? The system made all of their decisions for them. You can imagine what could happen to their life after that. Most become homeless, incarcerated or trafficked. Can you imagine how frightening this must be? How would your own children or grandchildren handle this? So. Much. Trauma. Quietly and patiently, a CASA volunteer enters this child’s life not long after entering the foster system. They become someone that is reliable because the child’s best interest is all that the CASA volunteer is focused on. They want the child to know that they DO have a voice - A CASA can make sure that voice is heard. In court. In school, we can let a therapist know recent struggles so the child has an option to discuss - if THEY choose. A CASA can give them some sense of security. Sometimes on a visit, we won’t talk much. Maybe just play cards - but these kids know that you are there FOR THEM. Becoming a CASA volunteer has changed my life in so many wonderful ways. I am definitely more aware and not as sheltered from reality. I am a much less judgemental person because now I know the stories that have caused generational poverty and neglect. In fact, my role as a volunteer has brought me to the decision to help more than just my own CASA case. I started working for Brightside in Development over 2 years ago. Now I am trying to change the future of more than 300 children by raising funds to support and increase the programming that is so vital to their future success. I encourage you to try to make an impact too. Volunteer, spread awareness of our mission, or donate. Call Brightside and ask for me. I will be happy to guide you to the best path for you. About the Author
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